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February 2010
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Ladies…Is He Into You Or Just Using You

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Is he into you or just doing you ??

This is not going to be done in one session but at least we can lay down some ground work things are different than it is for men and women.  Men are trying to figure out to get how to get a woman to like you.  Where women are more serious about looking for the right guy and making the right connection but at the same time trying to figure out what do men want so they can attract one they are looking for. Okay I am sure some of you have seen the movie “He’s just not that into you”,,, and I am sure we all wish that life was like a movie depending on the movie I will pass ,, "Nightmare on Elm Street" but you get the point.

Here is the thing you have to understand that some guys just want to have sex its that simple.   They don’t want to know how your day went or how you feel just when you coming over, but then again some women are just like that also.

Some guys are into you but only because you are convenient you are an easy lay but not because they want to be with you.  As soon as something else comes along that is better they will be on their way, then again some women are like that too.


Nothing wrong with a friends with benefits arrangement if both parties are on the same playing page.  The problem is that most women are on a separate than the men are, and the men to be honest are happy that the longer it takes a woman to figure it out the better.   Since Valentines is around the corner or maybe just passed for you its kind of good thing to know as a lady so you don't have those high expectations and get your hear broken, if it can be avoided sometimes we do cause our own pain by our own decisions.

Okay so you don’t want to be a booty call and you thought or hoping that it is more than just friends with benefits arrangement.

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Now I am going to elaborate on this more in future blogs on what signs to look out for but this is one of the most important.  If you remember in the movie “Ghost” Patrick Swayzee could not say ‘I love you” instead he would say “ditto”.  Yes I know its nice to hear and sometimes you have to hear it but here is the thing some guys know that.  Some of these guys will say “I love you “  as easy as saying “get me a beer”.  The most important thing is what does he do for you?  Its not about what he says anyone can say this or that and most of the time you find out that its just talk.  But when it comes time for the walk that’s what separates those that do from the losers and users.  When you need help does he come through does help you.  When you need him to be there for you when you are sick is he there for you.  When you feel overwhelmed do you see him offering a hand.  When he says he is going to call, does he call does he show up?  90% of the people in any situation say the right things they will say what you want to hear they all say the right things but when it comes time to doing something … then you hear the excuses,,, "I liked to but???""" or what ever else they come up with.  So what has he or she done for you lately not what have they bought you ,,,, DONE?

Remember anyone can talk but very few do.

If you have any questions on hooking up and trying to find someone online or need some relationship advice sometimes you just need to hear it from someone else just hit me up.   Hooking up and dating can be easy it does take work and sometimes you may not be thinking straight we have all been there.   Ladies you can ask away also you will get a guy's perspective but just remember you may not always like the answer.

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1 comment to Ladies…Is He Into You Or Just Using You

  • Erika

    Ok so I’ve been hooking up with a guy for 5 months already. I’ve really turned out to like him a lot. And our whole relationship has been just confusing. We started off fine with dinner dates or just hanging out and it seemed like we were in a relationship that was more than hooking up. There was a few times that he was drunk that he would ask me out and sometimes i would get the occasional “i love u.” We’ve had so many great times, but i dont know where the relationship is going. I know he cares about me. He plans things for us to do and when he went away to vegas one time he said he wished i could have gone. Yet when i spoke about our relationship he kind of made it clear that he did not want a relationship. And we both are really young too, I’m 18 and he’s 21… sometimes i feel as if he feels i am too young for him too. But yes i just dont understand him we have many intimate conversations and he says things like i love spending time with you and he even questioned doesnt it feel like we’re going out.. and he even talks about our future together jokingly saying “well when we get married-” or saying things like “in the future if i got a house, what kind of dog would you want to get?” Ugh help idk what to do? Im so confused? Does he like me as more than a hook up or what?